How To NOT Make a Bookworm Furious

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

We, bookworms, live a thousand lives. All of this makes us prone to a lot of things, like the ever so often urge to tear the eyelashes off of people who we think are a big hurdle to our life as a reader. A furious bookworm can be a little like a miniature version of your average five-year-old's monster. Miniature is mostly optional. So if you'd rather not have the added drama of a furious bookworm in your life...

Don't interrupt them while they are with their books
"Hey Sally, I'm bleeding to dea--"
It doesn't matter whether they are looking at the book like they might just throw it across the universe. Or sobbing in the most heartbreaking way possible.

Yes, you're a nice person. You want to comfort them. A "Can I help you?" or "What's wrong?" is completely what a nice person like you would do. But then, give it a second thought because a bookworm with their book, and an especially emotional bookworm with their book can be a danger to your life.

So let them be.

And if you are a bookworm whose eagerness to find out which book it is wins over your manners, eye the book from afar and figure it out on your own.

Never, interrupt.

(Unless it's a severe emergency in which case you can try to approach with caution. You don't want to get throttled to death by an angry bookworm who was just about to read THE part, which in turn is possibly every scene.)

Also, if you're going to interrupt and make conversation by asking what they are reading...

Don't ask them to chill out
It can be quite a bother to deal with a bookworm who just won't stop whining about what a character said or did that they totally didn't like. You have your own life to deal with! Can't they understand?

Well, yes. And no. It depends on the situation but if a bookworm is overacting they're probably not in  a situation to understand much apart from whatever is going on in their lovely brain.

So, deal with it. Keep your emotions at bay and maybe even nod along to what they are saying.

Never tell them to cut the crap. Unless you want to piss them off. But that pretty much defeats the purpose of this guide, doesn't it?

Don't pretend you know what they are talking about
You shouldn't lie and pretend with anyone, but the context varies.

So, the said bookworm or a group of them are talking about a character you have no idea about.

You feel left out so decide you want to join in on the conversation and- "OH YES, PATRICK! I LOVE HARRY SO MUCH TOO AND the red hai- uh, I mean blonde hair sure does spark my interest too!"

Patrick and you will be doin' good for a while.

Until one day when the topic comes out and life eagerly waits for you to face a bit of hell. You ask the bookworm who the hell Harry is and if he is that weird blonde neighbor. You realize the mistake just as the words leave your mouth.

But the damage is done.!
This might be the day Patrick sues you for lying to him.

Never tell them it's "not even real"
Did  you really just say that?

I refuse to believe anyone would actually say this unless they have exactly nothing to do with any fandoms, whatever and don't even have an ounce of fangirl in them.

So your bookworm is actually crying real tears (well, obviously?), or curled up in a corner because their favorite character died - or because their favorite ship sunk?

Okay, nice. Go comfort WITHOUT telling them that it's not even real.

So what if it isn't real? What do you mean it's not real? IT FEELS REAL.

Don't give spoilers
Don't spoil anything for anyone. Fullstop.

(But since I can't just leave it there..)

If you find out a bookworm is reading a book, the first thing you do shouldn't be starting to blabber about the book and finally ending up on a spoiler. Sometimes, they're not even intentional.

"I was so sad for George when it ended like THAT."

There you go. Whether it is a spoiler or not is a story for another day. (Oh, look I got a post idea!)

But now the bookworm knows something sad happens to George.

Don't take any risks and choose an exit of your choice, and move fast. Same thing if you spoiled it online, except maybe a little safer. But not really.

What are the things that makes YOU a furious bookworm?
And yes, hello to you too. In case you haven't noticed (ha ha), I am back!
 That did take a while, didn't it?